Is It my Ego or my Soul?
My rabbit hole of late has been the concept that most of us are generally ruled by our unconscious mind and ego-like beliefs. Practicing Kundalini has awakened me to the idea that we can actually clear society’s patterns on our subconscious. We can also clear patterns that were and are a result of our parents opinions, our upbringing and our daily environment. Once you start clearing all the debris then slowly you begin to connect to your ‘soul’ voice, guides, or inner spirit. More and more I am checking in with myself to see where a particular thought is coming from. Is it fear based? Is it an intuitive hit? Is it a form of protection to protect my heart? What does my higher self think? These are all questions that a few years ago would never have entered into my monkey mind.
On my trip to Kauai a few weeks ago I was constantly checking in with those voices to begin to discern the differences between them. One particularly poignant moment, was when an inner voice told me to go watch the sunrise at a favorite cove of mine. When I got to the top of the cove, I suddenly realized I had to walk through a dense forest in pitch blackness to get to the beach. Fearful voices that weren’t my instinct kept telling me to go back to the car ASAP and go home. When I checked within to see if it was an intuitive hit or just fear, I didn’t feel it in my body and it seemed like a knee jerk reactive kind of fear. I took a deep breath and used the light on my phone to light my path. I made my way slowly and cautiously down the steep slope. When I came out the other end I felt as if I had been birthed. When I reached the beach where the light was just appearing I felt immense relief and I felt victorious. I walked up to some rocks at the edge of the sea and began watching the most glorious sunrise I have ever seen. Challenging myself was a big moment in winning the battle between my fear of the unknown and wanting to see the world in it’s finest moment.
Our egos are our sense of identity and we all need to have healthy aspects of our ego to survive in this world. When the ego begins to undermine our highest good with fear talk, and questioning us with doubtful, nagging, voices of self hatred then we need to check it as we would with an annoying child. How do we do that?
~ By acknowledging the ego it begins to lose some of its power over us.
~ Surrender and trust that our intuition knows better than our ego.
~ Mediatate or have a practice so you are constantly having a relationship with your inner source.
~ Differentiate between intuition which is usually a sudden jolt and is felt in the body, rather the ego’s voice which is usually about saving our asses from some form of humiliation.
~ Read books on the subject, My favorite one these days is Guided by Hans Christian King. Another simple, concise one is Blink.
~ Practice certain kriyas or mantras to help the intuitive forces.
~ Clear the Pituitary Gland.